Dating is hard enough these days. We all know how difficult it is to meet someone who understands and supports you. For those living with any type of diabetes, there is the added struggle of disclosing that you have diabetes. You might have had a great night out, and he or she might look so cute in their outfit, and you could be entranced by the flip of their hair or smirk on their face after a really smart comment. But instead of worrying about how you’re going to handle the ‘good night kiss,’ you’re more worried about how to tell a potential mate that you have a chronic condition.

It might sound familiar for those in this situation—afraid of scaring off a possible new partner. You might hesitate since it could sound awkward if you have to explain that your sugar is low, or that your diet, on a night out, is limited. Diabetes is 24/7 situation that is not going to change, and there is no romantic getaway from it. Yes, it will remain a sometimes annoying third wheel, but the sooner you accept it, the faster you’ll be able to incorporate it into your love life.

You can’t let diabetes define who you are. It’s something that is happening to you, so you should never make it a taboo topic. If you’re feeling uncomfortable with your diabetes, then your date will sense that and feel uncomfortable too. The best way is to lay it all out as soon as you can, so it doesn’t hang over you and avoid making it a make-or-break issue, with questions like, “Can you deal with dating someone with diabetes?” Making your condition an obstacle or a game-changer is not going to make your date feel at ease.

No matter how you do it, getting to that point can be stressful, especially if you really like the person. There is no rule book on how to share your diabetic situation for the first time with anyone, let alone a potential lover, but there are some things you can do to make it easier and get from the “Really nice to meet you” to “I have diabetes.”

9 Dating Tips for Diabetics

Tell the person you’re with when it feels right to tell them. You don’t have to do it at a particular time or place, or after a precise number of dates. You’ll know when the moment is right, but the longer you wait to tell them, the harder it will be later on. So, skip doing it over introductions or on a first date, but don’t drag it out too long either.

Anyone with diabetes will tell you: their biggest fear is that their date will get turned off or lose interest once they reveal their condition. But isn’t it better to know that the person you’re attracted to cannot handle your situation before it gets too serious? It’s fine if not everyone can deal with your diabetes. That has to be OK. It’s better to know if you’re with someone who would not be able to support you since diabetes is only one type of challenges that life can bring you. Weed them out fast, and you’ll make room for true love to blossom.

Don’t overwhelm your date with the detailed science of your condition or the metrics of your glucose meter. You don’t have to count carbohydrates together over your first meal. Too much information might be too much to digest too fast and can overwhelm them. You can reveal that diabetes can be time-consuming but it’s treatable, and you can have a normal life. This will reassure any fears they might have. Put them at ease by answering any questions they might have, and get the monkey off your back so you can have fun, care-free.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of this article. 

Special thanks to Mona Mangat for writing this article.